Parenting

If you read my post yesterday, you know that I have been in a bit of a rut. You can imagine the parenting that gets done in seasons like this, but I've been actively trying to stay on top of attitudes (mine included) and build relationships.

I have a hard time with this, and some days are even harder. *grin*

Every single day, I have to get up and get going to create an atmosphere that the boys are used to. I think all of the time. Think about ways to love them more, ways to spend more time with them, then ways to teach them that this life isn't all about them.

I was reading one of my favorite blogs this morning and she spoke exactly what I need to tell myself over and over, every day, fifty times a day.

"But, taking time to make pleasant children for their own benefit and the benefit of others means encouraging at a young age that the world doesn't revolve around them.
Which means I must stay calm, cool, and collected in my heart and attitude so that she knows in her spirit I don't think life is just about me either."

I've become intentional about my reactions or lack there of. Not always good at not reacting, but I do realize that if there is a problem, my attitude in that moment is the most important thing. After all, I wouldn't want to teach my boys that the world doesn't revolve around them, but it does in fact revolve around their mother.

I've also had to step back and look at the whole picture. At the world through their little eyes. Most all of the behaviors we are currently dealing with stem from something I could have done better. Did they get enough to eat, enough sleep, have I been consistent with routines so that when I ask them to do something it isn't like the end of the world? Have I paid attention to the way they treat each other, so I can gently correct them before they get too upset at one another?

This parenting thing is such a huge responsibility. One that most of us chose to take on. It takes consistency, time, and prayer.

Our children need us. They need to know we are not only here for them, but we are here with them. That we are are willing to put the effort it takes every single day. Whether it be a check in with them on their attitude according to scripture, or even letting them know how I'm here with them when life gets frustrating.

I need to set them up for success by checking my attitude, taking care of all their needs including spending time with them, and keep them plenty busy with necessary tasks so they don't have too much free time alone that they get selfish when asked to do something, but enough time to play and be a child.

I have to remember that being the authority does not make me the boss, it makes me a servant. It's important to understand that myself, so my children understand that as well.

A servant is one who attends to the needs of others. It's a selfless job being a mother. It's hard, it's rewarding, and it's a blessing. It's a gift to be in the company of  The Greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven.

Mathew 18
2 He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. 3 And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.

This is how I chose to live my every day. These children are how God has blessed us so. He trusts us with them.

Kony 2012

Do you know who Joseph Kony is?
I didn't, but now I do.
And I think you need to know.
Please. Please, watch this video, and learn who he is.
Then...DO something about him.
This made me weep. I can't shake it. Jesus is in my heart, how can I not care?
I don't know if the man in charge of this is a Christian? He doesn't say.
But he..this man (Jason) is risking so, SO much by getting the word out.
He is working hard. Cover him in prayer please?
Then help him?

Jesus commands us to love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your might.
The question is, HOW do we love Him with all our heart, soul, and might?
The second command he gives might give us a good start.

To love others as we love ourselves.

If this was happening to you...how would you want to be loved?

30 minutes. Then help change the world.

Around Here

Man, I can't seem to keep up with this year at all! What on earth is happening?! We have gotten back into a routine. It feels nice to be cooking and teaching the boys more consistently these days.

We have been working very hard on reading, and I'll tell you what...he is doing SO much better. I mean, he is ENJOYING it. Yay!

We left a little treat in the mailbox for our mailman. (Part of our being mindful of others challenge)



These are old pictures, but I wanted to include our snowflake art project we did a few weeks ago...this is the closest we've gotten to snow this winter.

I let him do his ABC's







I love when the table is full of art supplies.



After being busy for the past few weeks, I was thrilled to make my "to do" list today. It included laundry, school, read the Bible, pilates, turn music up loud, and have a beautiful day.

That's MY kind of list. *smile*

Oh and I made strawberry fudge for my friend for her birthday. I *may* have had a small bite or six....uh yum. Had. No. Willpower.

well hello...2012

One week down and I think I'm still in 2011...or possibly 2001? I'm not quite sure!

Update: my friend (from the last post) found his daughter...a week later...in CA. She is safe. She is home. Praise God! Thank you for your prayers.

We are starting back school tomorrow. I'm SO excited! I have felt out of the routine for over a month, and I just can't handle that for long anymore.

I wrote a post about my yearly goals. I haven't finished it yet, but will. THIS week.

One of my biggest goals this year is to GIVE. Give time, give friendship, give to people in need. I want our focus to be on others as much as we can. Even the littlest things to make someone smile.

There are MANY ideas and ways to show someone you care. I love the 52 Smiles idea. Pick one thing a week and make someone smile. Here are a few of the ones I love:

make little care packages to give to the homeless. Just make some and leave them in the car.

Source: kwavs.blogspot.com via Jeana on Pinterest

Here is a whole list of ideas. Fun!

Source: katherinemariephotography.com via Jeana on Pinterest

This is just beautiful for May Day, or Mother's Day, or ANY day!

Source: katherinemaries.com via Jeana on Pinterest

I love Pinterest also, because if you follow your friends you can see little things they post that they love and maybe pick it up for them for no reason at all.
I will update throughout the year. Let me know the things you all come up with this year to show others they are special!

Urgent Prayer Request Please

This week has been really hard on my family and friends. Please pray for my brother and his family for some personal stuff.

I also ask you to take a look at this video. If you live in the area on the map, please keep you eyes out for our friend's daughter. She ran away Monday, Dec, 26. These are precious friends of ours. Please pray for them.

Christmas Joy

I mentioned the other day that we had signed up to deliver presents to kids who wouldn't otherwise be getting any. We woke Saturaday morning and headed out to load our car full of gifts to be hand delivered to these kids. We knocked on the doors and were greeted by children who couldn't contain their smiles! They had NO idea, and boy were they thrilled!

Our boys loved it. They were happy to be spreading joy this Christmas. It was such a blessing.

Boys squished together so we could fit all the gifts in the back of our car.



One shy to have his picture taken.



Then we came home to Chritmas movies and make gingerbread houses. We were so excited to have Uncle Seth stop by and make one too.

(no pictures of the process...I misplaced my camera...) But here are the results!

I also can't get the pictures to turn the other way...but this is Brighton's)


Jaiden's


Mine


Uncle Seth's


Tristin's


And my hubby's ....I think he was trying to show us up!


Merry Christmas!

Giving

Yesterday, I posted gift ideas for the little ones in your life. Although those are fun, we always want to include our children in making, picking out, and delivering gifts for others.

It's importnant for them to know that it means so much others when we think of them.

Our city has a huge project every year that gives gifts and coats to kids all around our city that otherwise wouldn't have any. Last Saturday was our homeschool day to meet at the huge warehouse and fill the boxes and wrap them. Brighton was very sick and so we did not make it, but THIS Saturday our church is delivering some of those packages to the kids! We have signed up to help deliver, and are getting really excited!

I've mentioned this before, but World Vision also has a catalog filled with gifts that help children and families all over the world! These gifts include goats, chickens, cows, water, soccer balls, and much more. A wonderful way to give!

Source: donate.worldvision.org via Cecilia on Pinterest

Then, we will be thinking of friends, family, and teachers/therapists. We are headed to the store tomorrow to pick up ingredients and supplies for all these fun treats! We are looking forward to spending the weekend together making these treats for our loved ones.

Source: cupcakesandcrablegs.com via Jeana on Pinterest

Source: food.com via Tammy on Pinterest

Source: beckyhiggins.com via Wendy on Pinterest

All packed into:

Source: sarahhearts.com via Jeana on Pinterest

Let's Just Choose

Preparing for another weekend with my little guys, I was anxious to see how it would go. I was starting the weekend with my parents at a Chonda Pierce concert. We all need to laugh...and ...um cry.

Words stuck out to me when she mentioned being a guest on Wanda Sykes' show. Wanda told her that she was the only christian that had ever been nice to her.

Why? Why is who we choose to represent in this world not being represented at all? People will never know Him if all they see is us. We have to let Him be what they see, NOT us.

I think it comes down to a choice. A single choice. You choose to follow Him and choose the way of righteousness. Or don't. But not both. You see, if you "choose both" you have turned you back on what is Holy.

It would have been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than to have known it and then to turn their backs on the sacred command that was passed on to them. 2 Peter 2:21

We can't afford to turn our backs on rigteousness. We pay a price. If we turn others' from His love, His mercy, His grace, His laws, then we have turned from it all as well.

Ezekiel 18:24 "But if a righteous man turns from his righteousness and commits sin and does the same detestable things the wicked man does, will he live? None of the righteous things he has done will be remembered. Because of the unfaithfulness he is guilty of and because of the sins he has committed, he will die.

Why not, intead of condeming others who are in sin (and not even counting our own sin) carry their burdens with them. Then, they could see HIM.

Galatians 6:2 Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

When we fall away from who He has given us knowledge to be, we crucify Him all over again. The people we condem see Him as they see us. Are we representing Him or us?

Hebrews 6:6 if they fall away, to be brought back to repentance, because to their loss they are crucifying the Son of God all over again and subjecting him to public disgrace.

You see friends, we are all in the same boat. We are all stained. We can all be cleansed by the same blood. The One who loves us all the same.

James 4:17 Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins.

If we choose Him, let's hold on to who He is and let others see Him.

Hebrews 4:14 Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess.

Letting Go

Currently pouring over the pages of this beautifully written book that has captivated me. Filling me with laughter, and then tears streaming slowly down my cheeks.

I call my mom, she had given the book to me yesterday. I tell her it was almost like I was reading my own words. She replied that she agrees and that it made her know me more.

"In all my years of longing to do something more significant with my gift of art, I never dreamed it would be used to give my child his voice."

Those words bounce off the page right back to me over again "give my child his voice" "give my child his voice" My eyes read those words and fill with tears.

God, please show me how to give my child his voice.

As little as a few months ago I would wake up with dread before my eyes ever opened. Before my feet hit the floor. Why wake up when no day seems different? Why wake up to feel utterly useless in the ability to keep my children protected without being worn down to complete exhaustion? Why? Why fight this 9 year old boy any longer?

God, then asked me to find the joy in the day. Any bit of the day, if there was an opportunity to open my heart to joy, do it. Over the next few days before I would open my eyes, God would fill me with joyful sounds and thoughts. Little did I know, he was giving me the opportunity to let go.

To let go of bitternees, dread, feeling scared, helpless, and hopeless. Letting go of feeling out of control. He had me, He had Jaiden, and I really could let go.

"It's time to throw out my ideas of what I thought life would be, should be, and let joy fill up those brand-new vacancies."  Emily said, as she vowed that if she was blessed with another day, she will wake up believing it was her last. "Don't waste it. We're going to get up and eat. We're going to get up and live."

As I drove my sweet little man to therapy this morning along with his friend, I looked for the joy in everything. The ways the trees worship, the colors of spring popping up over lawns and gardens, a family in the early hours packing up a car for what just may be a family vacation. I leaned over to buckle Jaiden's friend, and he gave me a big kiss! That's right, planted one right on my cheek! I haven't got to have a kiss from my own boy since he was a baby, but his friend graciously added to my joy this morning. And as I took my smiling guy in to therapy this morning, I gave him the biggest squeeze and told him I loved him. He laughed and went on to his room.

I think I have let go.

House of Belonging 


 

Compassion Week

We're kicking off Compassion Week again this week. I've posted about what we do a few months ago, but this week I thought we might just add a few things this time around.

We will be talking about what compassion is: caring about others, showing concern, helping and giving, listening and being patient, being able to recognize when someone is hurting.

Talk about compassionate people we know.

Create a compassion board. A list of words we think describe compassion.

Talk about what empathy is: understanding how someone feels. How would it feel to be them?

Talk about times it's hard to be compassionate, forgiveness, and saying I'm sorry.  

Ways to be compassionate daily: help brothers, prayer, chores without being asked.

Ways to show compassion in the community and the world.

Reading books. In a ton of books someone some how is showing compassion. We just used books right from our own little library. For example: Madeline. They show compassion for the man who hurt his leg. Her teacher showed compassion by helping and showing concern when she was sick. The dr. showed compassion by keeping her safe and warm. Her friends showed compassion by crying for her, visiting her, and bringing her flowers.

And some more examples: 

In Ping: we see the little boy having compassion for Ping. So his family doesn't eat him for dinner, he lets him escape

Horton Hears A Who: "A person is a person no matter how small"

Charlotte's Web: A small spider has compassion on her new friend, and helps him so that he isn't killed.

  

Please Pray

My friend Rachel posted this morning asking for prayer for her friend. Please pray for this beautiful woman and her family today. Thank you.

Jeana

A Time For Rest

This past weekend my husband and I were invited to attend a Marriage Retreat. Now, this isn't just any retreat. It was almost like a vacation, retreat, and a meeting of new friends all in one.

They had paid for the hotel we stayed in, all of our favorite snacks, and all the meals for the entire weekend. They also had a wonderful Life Is Good canvas bag filled with goodies, books, and much more.

All of this was far more than we ever needed, but it felt like a gift quietly given to us from God.

When we walked in, we knew no one. We were introduced to the 3 other couples, and became instant life long friends. Family. We had never been with others all weekend who were all from different parts of the country, all different ages, and had been through so many different things in life. The one thing God had bonded us together with was that we all had a child with special needs.

Now let me tell you what a breath of fresh air it was to not wonder when the moment will be that you share you have a special needs child, or when the moment will cross your mind that your 8 year has never done what someone elses'  has, OR the moment that comes when you again get smacked in the face that your life is different.

There was none of that. Only the feeling that we 100% completely fit in. We weren't different. Here, we were "normal".

Now, we don't always go around feeling sorry for ourselves when we are around accepting friends. Those are just some thoughts that cross your mind for a quick second and then leave. I'm just saying that the absence of those questions in my head were SO obvious this past weekend. One of the most comforting few days I've ever had.

We had moments with our new friends, moments learning about personalities and marriage, lots of time alone with our spouse, a date with our spouse out on the town, moments of filling our stomachs full of delicious food and dessert, and the filling of our hearts with time spent in prayer, meditation, and a few hours alone with God for the Sabbath.

As we talked around the room, I could sense how concerned we all were for our children. I could also feel how weary each and every one of us can get. But, in all of that, I saw the joy and sense of humor we all had despite our lives. I believe that the joy and laughter we all shared was only the grace, the love, the heart of God. We could choose to let this stuff get the best of us, or we can see God in all we do, involve Him in our daily lives, and watch as He works something we all may see as broken out for His good.

One of the biggest things that stuck out to me this past weekend was this:
I have so much to learn from these kids. If I could see people through their eyes I would not measure anyone by these measuring sticks we all tend to use based on your clothes, salary, homes, jobs, or even your face. I would love you unconditionally if only you will let me. I would make you see the lighter side in life. I would make you see Jesus. Because that's where He is at. Those are His eyes. That is His love.

It truly was an honor to spend the weekend led entirely by God. And it truly is a privilege to have these wonderful children in our lives, that most only get a glimpse of when they're out and about, but we get to be with every single day. By the grace of God.

 "The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves,
and not to twist them to fit our own image.
Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them."
T. Merton

Kicking Off Our Home School Compassion Week

The beginning of each month we have started Compassion Week. It's basically a week filled with projects and ideas geared toward others.

We started today, because we received a letter from one of our boys in Africa! The boys were so excited to hear from them and were thrilled to get started on our first compassion project of the week. Each month we write our boys. Boy, we had a great time together talking about and praying for our boys! Please excuse the bad lighting!

 

 

The ribbon letter idea from Impress Your Kids 

We will continue this week to plan ways to help others and show compassion. The list includes, visiting an elderly widow lady (who was our neighbor at our last house), making a meal for one of our close friends who is having surgery, and we are going to try and put an Operation Christmas Child Packing Party together! We'll see if I can get it together for next week, if not we will still do this project with our boys.

Happy Compassion Week! 

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