We go back and forth with the things we need to work on. We go from bad attitudes, talking back, and complaining to helpful, obedient, and patient. And I'm not just talking about the children. :)
We called the boys to do bible study one evening. They "paused" their playing as they quietly grumbled to the table. Honestly? It broke my heart. What are we even doing all of this for? They don't want to be here right now. They are full of their own selfish desires. I can assure you though it's not just them.
I got to thinking. It doesn't matter how much of God's word we read to them, how much I quote, or how much we memorize. We could do all this and God could still say, "I never knew you." We could read the Word until we are blue in the face, but that won't make them love God. It certainly never made me love God. Not until one understands God's love does he then truly love and know God. It's at that time when you want to open His word and get to know Him even more.
This humbling thought came across me. There is not one thing I can do to make sure my children love God, except them seeing God's love toward them in me. Even that's not me, it's all Him.
“Any obedience that isn’t motivated by his great love is nothing more than penance.” Elyse Fitzpatrick, Because He Loves Me
I've poured over countless books and even scripture trying to figure out how to correct and train our boys. I I soon realized that if I love them through the eyes of God, only then will their hearts turn to Him.
I read a post by Ann about Katie that captivated me. Talking about this 24 year old mother of 13 girls she said, "You mother as well as you know your Father. I look at Katie and all I can think: She mothers like she’s memorized the face of her Father. It is a holy witnessing."
Their is no secret to raising children who love the Lord. They see Him and feel Him through us. I don't want to move in any way with these boys unless it has the face of God all over it.
"Jesus did not save us so that we could do motherhood on our own, apart from him; he saved us so that we would be forever connected to him, forever dependent on him– on the sustenance that flows through the cord of his unending love. Jesus was cut off from the Father that we might not be cut off from him." Ruth from Gracelaced